Leave My Mind For Just One Moment

The spotted memories

Twist,

Curl,

Dance gracefully, frantically, in my mind

The one were our eyes met,

The one were you held my fingers

briefly

with your own

That time we talked about past days

And sad moments

I told someone, you, for the first time

 I heard the pain of regret in your soft voice

The words I wanted to say

As I watched you everyday that week

Filled by mind, body, mouth

In silence

But it was your words that made me

Look again for something

The missing part of me

That fills all of me to the last atom.

Oh!

I am so curious

I want to know how your faith is so strong

And makes me want to heal, grow, get stronger

I still want to know you better

I still want to know you

I still want to know

I still want...

Can't you leave my mind for just one minute?

I need to think things through

Like how my shyness became me

And that's the end of me and...

Why Can't I Just Forget About You?

The First Time I Saw the Lights in Your Eyes

 I'll do it right the first time

Because I'm not ready to live like everyone else

I'll do it right the first time

Because that's what I want

"But the heartbreak, experience,

the knowing you're actually in..."

But can't you see?

This is me. I know me.

Maybe this is meant to be like this

As much as I hate it

And don't want it

And may want to trade it in a second.

But my heart is aching as it tells me

how romantic it will be

to finally say to him one day

"I waited my whole life just for you"

Only you.

Always you.

I'll know. I'll know.

You're the one I dream about having.

We'll do it right the first time.

And even if you end up being my second

And I'm your fourth

We'll get through.

Because He keeps us in His circle of time.

Drop Like Wallflowers to the Ground

I keep myself busy

So I forget who I am

Because I don't need to be reminded

That I'm alone

Being by myself

Is less tiresome

Then being with the crowd

And standing there

Standing.

Watching..

Waiting...

Wishing....

And wanting to cry

Because you can't

Talk

To any of them no matter what you think

Even at home you are the same

Because no one 

watches, talks, waits, looks

At you

Are we just more independent?

Or we just good at faking

The loneliness we feel

Onto fake smiles and well wishes?

But know what?

It only matters when it gets to you

And you, out of everyone,

Believe it to be true.

Can I  listen to you?

Relationship Identity Crisis

I suppose it wasn't enough

Though I thought it was

It's never enough

It will never be

What is the meaning to the word

That I thought that we were

Is it a pun? I guess

I just don't understand

It is always about you
And I shouldn't mind because I'm happy to have you
But were do I go
For an ear and shoulder?

I just don't want to push my luck

Because I don't know

How far a push

will go

Before we snap.

But I won't say

That it hurts me deepest

Because I don't know you anymore

And we could be the same

And I miss the us before

Who are we now?

What are we?

Who am I?

Hey World; It's Time to Take Me On

I always hate driving you home

Because I never know

How it's going to be later

Between you and me

We could spend weeks not talking

Or texting 

Or emailing

And I hate that part the most

I like it when we're closest

Like we use to be

And I think finally

I've got it in my mind

It's okay to talk about the past

And what happened

And maybe open that up

Because it's a part of you and me and us

But more than that...

I think I've learned that I need

To let it go

And talk about it casually

once in a while

Whenever you're ready we will

I won't make it into a big deal

Because it's not

And I love you, my friend.

Who you were: I loved

Who you are: I love

Who you will be: I will love

That is what He's taught me lately

Wherever we go from here

Just know that's how it will forever be

No matter how much seems to come between us

In the good and bad and parted ways

this is what i've learned

The Ivity In Creativity

Creativity

Always seems

To be wiped

Clean out of me

Though the days get longer

There is always more to do

And I forget, yes, to stop

And look around me

Look Around!

It's all around

Even when you can't see it

Even when you can't feel it

It's in plain sight

Now its in the shadows

And all you need to do

Is open up and see

And embrace it to yourself!

It wants you

The pictures, the words, the melody, the art

It's always been in your head, your heart

So Do Your Thing; Live Your Art!

Hands Holding Hearts

The hand I once held

Belonged to someone I knew

I knew better

Than I knew everyone else

It was the hand we dropped

When things got rough

The only one

That would always have picked me up

It was that hand I reached for

Wanting to know its touch again

Wanting to remember

Every line, every pulse in that hand

The hand I got was not the one I wanted

So cold, dead, undeserving

Of a fate 

I do not understand

A hand held mine

Squeezing and assuring everything was fine

I need time

To find who I should have been all along

But where was the life in that hand?

I will grasp the fingers between my own

And wait for the warmth 

and the pulse 

and the colour

To return to every cell.

It will be your hand I hold

When we dance again

Under the stars

Like those nights long and far ago

Our hands raised above our heads